It's not a huge secret that the last six months I have tried to make the best of this world I allowed myself to be flung into. There are so many great things and even if I sound like a fool I am gonna say this place is magical. I have had so many adventures in the short amount of time here. From seeing things that are famous,(including people) to witnessing history on Wall Street from my own window. I have danced home on the subway as the sun was about to come up, kissed strangers, and been lost in china town in a dirty shady apartment. Old friends have come into my life, while making memories with some of my very best friends. I got my first grown up job (right on wall street)and met people I will remember forever.
I'm so grateful for this experience.
But I want to tell everyone at home, as much as I have "lived my life." I miss home, I miss being able to be close to people that really really know me. Cole and Lane really really know me, but that's all I have here. I thought I was jumping on the ride to start living my life, but what I did, is leave life behind long enough to avoid growing up.
And Maybe I won't grow up, ever... And I don't think the point of life is to grow up. My point is this, I have been everywhere I always thought I needed to go, London, LA, Vegas, New York. The truth is, The reason those places have been so great to visit are the people that were there with me.
And I believe that you can make friends where ever you go. But why keep making friends, if you are going to dance away at some point.
I don't know what I am going to do, but I can't do this anymore. I need to be closer to familar things. I need to see my nieces grow up, I want to be at my brothers graduation. I want to be able to drive to my mom's house whenever I need a taste of home. I want to drink to much at the lake while getting a tan I already have. I want to see my BFF's become mom's, and I think I am ready to settle down a little..
So I am not giving up, I thought I should stay here to prove that I could make it out here.. But I have learned that is a really bad reason to stay. To really live your life, you should do it with people that you love.. I may not get on that airplane back to NYC