It's not a huge secret that the last six months I have tried to make the best of this world I allowed myself to be flung into. There are so many great things and even if I sound like a fool I am gonna say this place is magical. I have had so many adventures in the short amount of time here. From seeing things that are famous,(including people) to witnessing history on Wall Street from my own window. I have danced home on the subway as the sun was about to come up, kissed strangers, and been lost in china town in a dirty shady apartment. Old friends have come into my life, while making memories with some of my very best friends. I got my first grown up job (right on wall street)and met people I will remember forever.
I'm so grateful for this experience.
But I want to tell everyone at home, as much as I have "lived my life." I miss home, I miss being able to be close to people that really really know me. Cole and Lane really really know me, but that's all I have here. I thought I was jumping on the ride to start living my life, but what I did, is leave life behind long enough to avoid growing up.
And Maybe I won't grow up, ever... And I don't think the point of life is to grow up. My point is this, I have been everywhere I always thought I needed to go, London, LA, Vegas, New York. The truth is, The reason those places have been so great to visit are the people that were there with me.
And I believe that you can make friends where ever you go. But why keep making friends, if you are going to dance away at some point.
I don't know what I am going to do, but I can't do this anymore. I need to be closer to familar things. I need to see my nieces grow up, I want to be at my brothers graduation. I want to be able to drive to my mom's house whenever I need a taste of home. I want to drink to much at the lake while getting a tan I already have. I want to see my BFF's become mom's, and I think I am ready to settle down a little..
So I am not giving up, I thought I should stay here to prove that I could make it out here.. But I have learned that is a really bad reason to stay. To really live your life, you should do it with people that you love.. I may not get on that airplane back to NYC
My Blog List
Central Park
Lane and Dante took me on a sunday stroll
About Me
- Amanda
- New York, New York, United States
- I'm just a small town girl trying to make it in the city... Just a tourist in my own neighborhood. I live in New York now but I miss my buddies in St. George.
5 comments:
Wow Amanda this post made me CRY! Maybe because I am pregnant..:) We all miss you back here at home too! And are getting excited when everyday passes cuz we know your coming to visit! I hope everything works out for you and I know you will make the right chose. Just follow your Heart! We love you girl!
It almost made me cry too! You will make it if you stay or go back.. and it's never to late to grow up..haha you'll be fine.. love ya DorA
HAHA!!KAILEY... PREGNANCY REALLY DOES MAKE US EMOTIONAL.. AMANDA I CRIED TOO.. I REALLY DO MISS YOU SO MUCH AND ENVIED YOU WHEN YOU MOVED BUT I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND BEING HOMESICK AND WANTING TO COME HOME.. I HOPE YOU DO:) CAN'T WAIT TO SEE U THE END OF THIS MONTH.. LOVE YA!!
haha I look at the above posts and now laugh because I'm sitting at the computer crying....Lane loves you so much and I've enjoyed getting to know you!! Your such a sweet girl and awesome friend! We know you'll make the right decision of where to go and we're super excited to see ya on your visit HOME!! :)
You are a brave girl! You always do say what you think and don't mix words. You know that is why you are so loved, right?! I hope I can see you when you come home. Looks like you, Janie, and Michelle had a great time!
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